day and night.

I am frustrated, irritated and uncomfortable. I want to drive home right now. I wish I could. I can't wait for tomorrow. I actually never thought I would say that because I really do love it here. Maybe it's because we have been around one another more then enough and I think I miss my good old home town loves. I feel like just going to bed to wake up to tomorrow, but I won't because it's my last night here. When I went out last night I had a lot of fun. Me and Kara danced together the whole night because everyone else was wherever. I didn't drink a lot because of my lack of money but I was just wanting to dance anyways. We danced a lot on the platforms, and it's weird because I was thinking last night about how self conscious I used to be when I danced. I never felt comfortable in front of anyone, even my friends and I find it so exciting to do things like that now, it's like a complete new me but I love it. I wish I was never so shy and awkward when I was younger. I think a lot of things could have been different, but i guess it's too late for that now. Either way, I enjoyed last night, and it was the best night I've had in a while.

I feel like a bitch right now because I was trying to help Emily with something but I think I made it worse. I don't think she understood what I was trying to say at all, so I guess I will have to wait to explain it in person if I see her this weekend. Things with the boy are better now which I'm happy about because I felt bad for ignoring him the whole night. I do think it was ideal though because I don't do shit like that to make it worse, I do it so he can understand how I feel and how relationships work. He was really understanding though and i'm glad we were on the same page about things later on. I just told Jake that when we hangout, whenever that is, that I don't need him telling me that he wants me back anymore and that I just want to be like normal friends. I really hope he understands because I will be more then happy to see us just get along like we never dated. That doesn't mean I will forget that we did, I just mean that as an example.

For now I think I'm done writing. Goodnight.